I am going on a diet. No, not that kind of diet. A social media diet. Imagine I am starting Phase 1 of the South Beach Diet, and Facebook is carbs. I was originally thinking of it as a social media "strike," but that sounds too negative. I hold nothing against Facebook and it's peers (Twitter and Google+); in fact, I LOVE reconnecting with old friends and being able to keep in touch with everyone so easily. The problem is that I am pretty sure I am addicted to it, the same way I am addicted to baked goods. I just cannot get enough. If a loaf of freshly baked bread, or a batch of scones or oatmeal cookies were sitting on my kitchen counter all day, every day, I would weigh 300 pounds. Facebook is like a fresh loaf of pumpkin bread to me. If I am going to consume it responsibly, I need to keep my distance for a while to lose my incessant cravings.
The other reason I am cutting back is that I feel the constant access to other people's activities is affecting my mood. Big time. Somehow, "keeping in touch" with my 305 friends turned into "competing with" them. More specifically, I find myself jealous and resentful of those who tend to portray their lives as wonderful, fulfilling and perfect ALL. THE. TIME. You all know those people, right? And the rational part of me knows that their lives are NOT actually perfect, but I cannot help but feel like they must be doing something better than I am to have something sunny and warm to say every day. The irrational, neurotic side of me says "why can't you be more like them?". I feel inadequate and unsatisfied because of stupid STATUS UPDATES, and that is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO not right! It is not that I want these people to be unhappy, it is simply that I apparently cannot tolerate disingenuine people-- not even if everything I know about their daily life can be summed up in a few sentances. Same goes for the chronically negative, but there are less of those out there, so I just hide them.
The truth of the matter is that even mundane, every day posts have started getting to me. It is almost like I am living vicarioualy through other people's status updates. I cannot wait to see what the people out there with new babies have to say, because I miss having a new baby (but no, I do not ACTUALLY want another one); I crave the posts from the single professionals so I can daydream about having a "real" job where I get to wear nice clothes and travel "for business" and have "drinks with my coworkers" and people respect me and all that crap. All day long, I am comparing my life to everything I see on Facebook (not just the really good or the really bad, but EVERYTHING). In other words, I am messed up.
I need a break. Starting immediately after I post this link tonight, I will not check Facebook, Twitter or Google+ on my laptop, phone, iPad or anyone else's device for the next month. AHHH!!! Of course, I want to stay in contact with my peeps, so I will still be checking email, texting, accepting any Facebook messages (I do have it set up so it automatically emails any messages to me), and my blog will upload automatically to facebook, as it normally does. But do not expect me to know who is pregnant, had a baby, got engaged, got separated, got a new job, or ate a really yummy dinner last night, because status updates are persona non grata in my house!
When the month is over-- mark your calendars for September 24-- I will see if I can slowly ease my way back into social media, and I will keep anyone who cares posted (get it? "posted?" ha!) on my progress from social media addict to responsible consumer.
Ruth, you are an amazing lady. I admire you and your determination....
Next time we see eachother at the gym, let's schedule a run, a mamas only run! No kids, hubbies are in charge. Lord knows I could myself use a dose of girl time and fresh air. You interested?
...or coffee. I'm always game for coffee ;) see how easy it is to talk myself out of running? Ha ha.
Alison
Posted by: alison boehm | August 24, 2011 at 07:27 AM